Sabrina Del Fico Social networks are a double-edged sword: if on the one hand they inspire us to improve, on the other they fill us with doubts and insecurities. Here's how to learn to best manage the constant comparison with what we see online (without being overwhelmed by it)
Every day and hour scrolling on Instagram and Facebook exposes us to pictures of perfect bodies, dreamy holidays, beautiful houses, and professional success. Overly polished, these images are at times idealized and feed an ongoing circle of comparisons that is never satiated.
Watching the perfect life of friends, influencers, or celebrities just may lead us to measure this against the real thing. On the other hand, such comparisons with high and sometimes unreachable standards put forward on social media can be two-edged swords.
On one hand, it may act as a stimulant for us to improve our lives by building habits and routines that eventually pay off in tangible ways.
When we see motivational content or take insights from consistency and routines, that might inspire us to push ourselves further and set ever more ambitious goals. On the contrary, perpetual comparison often fuels envy and dissatisfaction. For as long as we compare ourselves with those whom we feel are wealthier, more handsome, or simply more successful, we create a vicious circle of upward comparisons.
We start to feel like we will never be enough in appearance, in finances, or in career, convinced that no matter how hard we try, it simply won’t ever be good enough to meet those admired standards of beauty or success.
The differences in these comparisons can mess with our values and lead us toward seeking validation from others rather than authentic personal satisfaction.
But let’s not forget that on social media, we only get part of the story: behind all those beautiful pictures sometimes hide a number of problems and difficulties that stay concealed — we all choose to share only the most beautiful side of our lives.
Finding balance
But as usual, the answer isn’t radical-we don’t have to demonize social network sites to seek inner balance. Rather, it is a conscious use that would not allow comparisons to become destructive.
The following are some of the ways I adopt to be able to use social media judiciously-to let it inspire rather than discourage me.
- Declutter your feed: If we feel that there are some profiles that make us feel somehow incomplete or feed our envy, it’s fine to just unfollow them. Instead, show priority to the content that actually inspires you and makes you move, and speaks to the real you.
- Practice gratitude. Devote a few minutes of your day to thinking about what one already possesses and be grateful for it. This small habit can dramatically change our perspective. Instead of focusing our attention on what we still don’t haveracat physical appearance, success, relationship, or fortune learn to appreciate what is already a part of your life.
- Comparison to inspiration: The next time one finds oneself comparing to individuals who seem luckier, try to make that comparison an inspiring one. Before actually feeling envy, ask the question: What could I learn from this person? What steps can I take in bettering my life?
- Practice empathy. Social networks mean so much to us because they connect people from very different walks of life; often they share similar passions and interests. Why not take advantage of technology to create positive links between one another instead of the other way around? Find more authentic profiles kept up by real people, relationships that are real; avoid virtual perfection.
- Take a detox. Finally, shutting down social media once in a while can be refreshing. It reconnects us with practical life and reinstates a better vision about our life.
